How did I choose an introverted lifestyle?
I have a friend from school who is intelligent and creative but he was more introverted and hangouts with only a few people. So, I asked him one day why you choose this personality type?. He said, “I don’t know. He paused for a moment and told me that I didn’t cared about my personality until one day I started thinking about it when I am 26 years old, maybe, I did not choose to, circumstances made me”.
Family and my earlier days
My dad is a teacher and my mom is a housewife. Dad doesn’t talk too much but he is more interested in exploring new things. So, genetically he might be one of the reasons I am like this, on the other hand, mom is talkative and socializes with people. She is the only person’s voice you will hear if you are outside our home.
Second object, I am an average student from my childhood and not very active. If we are avg and do not have much energy, most likely we will be in the inactive category of students in the class(silent but good kids). And in our home counties education system good is not sufficient for any teacher or parents and they treat us as useless. But that didn’t affect me much, because I am not that intelligent sufficient to figure it out at that time. It might affected me deep inside but I didn’t bothered. I have been a loser for all most 2 decades but losers will also have friends and family so it’s not an issue.
Change of places- my education is not at one place my entire life as my father worked in government, he used to change places every couple of years. So, I went to many schools. Starting fresh each time is a very tough job and making friends at each place is also and frustrating. So my mind decided it differently I guess? If we have to disconnect friends every few years why do we even have to connect? That’s why I only have a few long-time friends and family, whether you like it or not you have stuck with them your whole life(in a good way)”.
My thoughts said so
As Everyone knows, we(introverts) think so much than talk. For every situation, we have too many questions in mind. Our thoughts are like scrambled eggs and will not be able to make any decision that fast and it’s a good quality about us. Why? Because as our elders said, For every good decision we make we should think twice but I think like a hundred times to avoid single point of failures. That’s how a scientist or an engineer or any intelligent person works. Temporary fixes bring us only temporary outcomes.But the problem with me(introvert), I think a lot about every small issue in the universe. And that doesn’t mean my decisions are always Right though. That might be the reason I stayed moderate in my education. My state of mind is always scattered and with a substantial amount of questions and confusion
Education system
“As I said earlier, that I think very much and analyzing any type of issue is in my personality, at my 20’s I realized something about books which I hated until then. we know reading books make us very intelligent but seeing so many pages in a book makes me sleep. But here is the thing, There will be thousands of books in a library but every book is not for us. Based on our interests they are divided into categories. We need to find our genre before you start reading , movies and songs among other examples.
In a similar way, in a classroom they are mutiple types of students some students learn by themselves, some get assistance from their parents, some will not have much interest, some depend on teachers. Everyone can’t be taught in the same way. In our home countires education system, every classroom will have a single point of focus. Teachers can teach or will teach to only one section of students who are already intelligent . I am in the stage of becoming better version of me
but I was looking for someone to push me but no one showed up. My style of learning is getting the details of why we need to learn something like why we need to learn about velocity? why the earth has gravity?? why e=mc2 among other examples. We Need to know where these are applicable in real-time not what was in a textbook.It may be our Entire education is like that or I might be in the wrong places in my entire life”.
Responsibilities and goals:
“I had more fun in my undergrad and ended up with not great scores.
I Moved out for my higher education to the United States after a certain age and my parents are not ok to send me. I pushed hard to make them agree. But I decided, my only goal should be my studies and career and mostly focused on it whole time and not interacted with many people. After some days , I got more interested in startup culture in the united states. So without wasting time I spent a lot of time focusing on how to build a startup company. I tried and tried but never got confidence, neither I build connections with people. I avoided them and gatherings because I felt like I get distracted with by goals. But neither the idea nor connections worked out”.
Heath and fitness
“When I am in my home country, I got some health issues but I recovered.But In my masters(United states) I drank a lot which might disrupt my immunity. So in fear and not to take risk I reducing drinking and also reduced social gatherings (I can’t control drinking if these are long nights). That is also a reason for avoiding people”,
So, overall, it’s a mess I created myself or someone else in my life created but I am ok being an introvert, our thoughts are very genuine and we are,we are smart. We are better than people who do acting to impress people followed by fake emotions in their everyday life.
But to conclude, whatever I said before might some related scenarios that made me an introvert or all. And everyone is different and has different pressure points becoming who we are. Changing ourselves is part of life”.
